As school starts again, we are once again confined to our school’s walls, surrounded by headache-inducing fluorescent lights, getting hand cramps from writing timed essays and staring intently at math problems, hoping the correct answers might suddenly reveal themselves. However, within these walls, we can also find our new classmates, best friends and romantic partners who will make us feel comfortable in this stressful environment. Unfortunately, no matter how we envision this year, many social dynamics will change, but this can be for the better.
Drama will undoubtedly plague friend groups at some point, with relationships that we once believed to have the fortitude of a brick wall crumbling with a single text. This social instability will leave many searching for answers in the chaos.
Guidance counselor John Markovich offered insight on gauging the value of relationships undergoing turmoil: “If [a conflict] is not something that is going to impact your relationship, let it go. If it is, the question becomes if this connection is important enough for me to go and have that difficult conversation.”
Idling in the limbo that is the uncertainty of whether or not a relationship will continue is unhealthy for everyone. Even though answering Markovich’s question could be difficult, it must be answered. Markovich also suggests that the friendships made as young people will be some of the best in our lives, so it is crucial to find the beauty in each relationship, past or present. Being able to reminisce on relationships – even those we have ended – is indispensable in our attempts to grow as people and forge new connections.
Letting go of people is challenging, but maintaining healthy relationships with those we choose can prove to be more difficult. With connections we choose to nourish, it is critically important to learn to forgive even the smallest of issues.
The tiniest annoyance is best communicated to prevent the slightest possibility that it could lead to something worse. We must fight for relationships that we genuinely believe in, and that means establishing stable communication. Becoming comfortable with “I apologize” and “I forgive you” is the only way to preserve a connection.
Forgiveness can be grueling and sometimes unnatural, but it is necessary. With forgiveness, you can find the strength to be with or leave somebody, allowing you to find the beauty in human connection. Forgiveness is not succumbing to others; it is valuing yourself.
Markovich conclusively advised, “You are going to hurt people, you are going to get hurt. The more you can let that go and forgive, the more you can focus on the things that matter in life.”
