There are 1146 students enrolled in Kaneland High School. Each student has an individual story. Every student has a home life and a school life. Every interaction that each student has comes with the possibility of affecting them and impacting whom they interact with for the rest of the day. By living our day-to-day life, we change everyone else’s day without even realizing it. Adjusting our actions by looking at them from others’ perspectives can allow us to see the bigger picture and hidden struggles that everyone is dealing with. It can put things in perspective and evoke the realization that now is not forever.
High school is one of the most significant periods in a person’s life. It is filled with stress, changes and challenges that can be mental, physical and social. Everyone who sets foot into school has other struggles that we likely do not know about. Balancing school on top of personal struggles can be a challenge for many, especially when they are close-minded.
Gaining perspective can be helpful for remembering the bigger picture and keeping in mind that not all problems are permanent. When someone is acting distant or different from someone else, a person’s immediate reaction may be to criticize them or question their actions. A person’s actions can be a reflection of other things going on in their non-school life. Realizing that we all have similar fears and struggles can help us feel less alone.
Throughout senior Xander Figueroa’s four years at Kaneland, he has observed changes involving himself, other people and how he treats others.
“If people are going through certain things, maybe some kind of anxiety or depression or something that they’re dealing with, it’s important to make them feel like they’re not different from everyone else,” Figueroa said. “We’re all just humans going through our own things.”
Many people isolate their problems, assuming that others won’t understand what they are going through. It is important to recognize that there are billions of other people with completely different lives and perspectives; no one is alone.
“It makes people want to be around you more if you can understand somebody’s perspective and what people are going through,” Figueroa said. “Doing this makes me feel better because I feel like I can understand anyone and be someone for people to talk to.”
Even when people get nervous about something, it can be helpful to note that there are millions of others going through the same thing. For example, there may be a student in your class who didn’t complete his study guide and is petrified that he is going to fail an upcoming test. There are so many other students who feel the same way. Looking from this perspective can be a comforting reminder that nothing is as big as it may seem.
The majority of people have gone through something that they were extremely nervous about. In hindsight, the moment generally passes and is rarely permanent. There are many scary moments involved in growing up, but we don’t have to go through them alone.
Ava Kraus is a sophomore who has been a part of the cheer program for the past two years. She is friendly and always tries to relate to other people.
“Cheer tryouts were pretty nerve-racking for me because I didn’t know what team I would make, and I wanted to make sure I was with my friends,” Kraus said. “It ended up being good, and I learned that the whole team was pretty nervous. It was comforting to take a step back and realize that I wasn’t the only person feeling that way.”
She was nervous leading into cheer tryouts, but it wasn’t as big of a deal as she initially thought. It was helpful for her to see from other people’s perspectives and realize she wasn’t alone.
Last year, when Kraus was a freshman, she had completely different views on high school, just as any incoming freshman would. A big school with new people and teachers can be intimidating, but as Kraus has experienced all of the things she was nervous for, she realized that it wasn’t as scary as it seemed.
“Once I actually talked to the people I was intimidated by, I felt silly for even being scared,” Kraus said. “I realized that I wasn’t alone in being nervous for things, and this even helped me be a friend to the people I was scared of.”
With so many people and different life stories surrounding us, it is impossible to truly relate to everyone. The interactions we take part in have the potential to change someone’s mood every minute of every day. The least we can do is be open to different people and try to see where they are coming from.
“You can’t understand somebody’s problem until you’ve walked in their shoes,” high school social worker Emily Skonieczny said. “We can think and sympathize and do everything we can to try and understand, but until you have lived that experience, you truly don’t know.”
Skonieczny has an office at our school where she welcomes students to talk to her about anything. Being a school social worker has allowed her to see a variety of perspectives on a daily basis. She said that her observations have helped her become a better person and friend, as well as allowed her to empathize with what others are going through.
“[The biggest thing] is this sense of compassion,” Skonieczny said. “When I’m working with my students, I see them the whole school day. Then [they] go home and live an entirely different life outside of these doors, and it is still my job to be here the next day so they know [they] feel safe and supported.”
Having a sense of compassion helps Skonieczny excel at her job. She has to always be there for students and constantly think from their perspective about what is best for them.
Senior Megan Fisher has also practiced looking at things from others’ perspectives. She finds that looking at situations from different points of view helps her worry less.
“Since everyone’s so focused on themselves, it is difficult to understand other people’s situations,” Fisher said. “If you really get out of your own head and apply what other people are going through, it would be easier to understand where everybody’s coming from.”
We all carry our own baggage, and sometimes it can feel consuming. Escaping our tunnel vision and seeing the world from others’ eyes has helped Fisher realize that everyone is going through similar problems, and she is not alone.
”Looking at others’ perspectives makes me feel more understanding,” Fisher said. “Understanding others helps me feel less alone and not as caught up in my own head.”
Dealing with our problems can feel like the end of the world. Acknowledging others’ problems and situations can open a new world of possibilities. When we recognize the struggles that other people are having, we can realize how our problems may not be as bad as we think.
When we try to understand someone else’s point of view, we can see the hidden struggles that they may be dealing with. One of the most important things in life is to be kind to everyone, regardless of prior feelings towards them.
“It’s important to understand that everyone has different issues, and we need to be open-minded on how people are feeling and handling themselves,” Figueroa said.
Everyone has their own stories and backgrounds. The words that we say can affect people, even in ways that we didn’t think were possible. No one truly knows what someone else is going through or how their thoughts reflect on their actions. Being compassionate towards others and trying to understand them is essential when trying to see the bigger picture.
